thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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