hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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