but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
