They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
