i think i have two assholes
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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