You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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