is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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