Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
