Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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