If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
