i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
She needs sedatives and a leash
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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