I want to have your abortion
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
