found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
