I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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