shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
