You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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