we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Dicks are not precious.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize