oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
