id be glad to
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
