Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
