if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
