I hope mine doesn't look like that
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize