So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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