We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
The air was thick with penises
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
