i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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