good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
