Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
