No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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