ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
