like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Randomize
