Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
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