just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
