Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
