All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
