Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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