awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
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