it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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