Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
why is half of my head shaved?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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