They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize