Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
