You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
