your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
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