I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Sorry my hands just texted you
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
