when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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