hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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