The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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