we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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