you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
