i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
