I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
