so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Why did my mother make you get naked?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize