margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
